B was surfing around, looking up the latest activities of our pal when he saw that the first thing on Google that came up was "G--memorial...". First, he thought perhaps it was another person who shared our friend's namesake, but when he went to the page, sure enough, there was a photo of our dear friend.
Talk about shock. :-(
Here we were, waiting for G to get in touch with us, as was his usual way, which--as I wrote on the memorial blogpot site, is testament to G and his sometimes larger than life character...always seeming to find ways to keep touch with EVERYONE in his life in some form.
Really, though: friendship is a two-way street is it not? Both sides must strive to keep in touch, to keep the friendship strong and healthy, if it is to last through years of the good, the bad, and the ugly, which our relationship with G certainly endured. I'm sorry to say that G was much better on the communication grounds than we were, much as I like to pat myself on the back for keeping in touch with others.
He was one of the busiest people we've ever known in life: teaching, researching, counseling, mentoring, traveling, giving presentations. But somehow, he found time to reach his friends. Like us. Calling from the beach while on break from his conference. Calling us before his plane would take off to somewhere (for a conference). Calling us en route to work or a conference. He was always on the move!
Here I am, on Facebook every evening, and never checking his page all summer long, thinking he's too busy having fun with family and friends in India. Mil and fil asked about him, but all we knew was that he was going to Nairobi, Kenya, to act as chaperone for his nephew, to meet up with G's brother. And going on a safari with his nephew. It sounded like the ultimate G vacation to us! Living life to the fullest! :-)
No word from G all summer long. A little unusual, but we didn't think much of it. And now, today, we discover that the world has been without one, incredible human being since June 29. How dumbstruck do you think we feel? And regretful we didn't keep in touch more?
At the end of ten days in Kenya~on the day of his return back to his family in Goa, India, he just collapsed and died immediately. :-(
I cannot stop crying. :~(( It is unbelieveable he has left us~WAY too soon. We have known G for almost all our married life~nearly two decades, when we met in a church in the Bay Area--which we all stopped attending long ago. G was our mentor, counselor, big brother, challenger, best friend. He was an integral part of our lives.
We will miss his brilliant mind, his intense presence, his annual visits, his phone calls from everywhere. And for me, I will miss his hearty laughter most of all. It was truly contagious! Few people ever made me laugh as much as he did. ;-)
G's ceaseless, intense support for human rights and justice inspired us to be advocates for the same. He was our inspiration in many facets of life, and he loved to debate us on anything and everything, often playing devil's advocate. He was never afraid to challenge our beliefs and goals, and was always, always supportive. He was respectful of our family members and endeavored to engage them in conversation. He lived lived life to the fullest and was proud of it. :-)) An example to follow. G was the ultimate friend anybody could hope for!
In honoring G's memory, hubby and I will endeavor to become better friends to our friends and become stronger, better advocates for the causes we hold dear to our hearts. ;-)
Though we are QUITE heartbroken and in shock, we know that we have been truly blessed by one incredible human being, loved by many friends around the world, including us. We did not get a chance to say good-bye to our dear friend who enriched our lives immeasurably for the last 18+ years. He was the kind of friend whom you could not IMAGINE life without! The kind of friend whom you wanted around FOREVER. He will be sorely, sorely missed by us.
G, wherever you are, we loved you deeply. You have a place in our hearts forever.
A Time to Talk
by Robert Frost (1874-1963), American poet
When a friend calls to me from the road
And slows his horse to a meaning walk,
I don't stand still and look around
On all the hills I haven't hoed,
And shout from where I am, 'What is it?'
No, not as there is a time to talk.
I thrust my hoe in the mellow ground,
Blade-end up and five feet tall,
And plod: I go up to the stone wall
For a friendly visit.
