I Need a Magic Wand

Where's my fairy godmother?!

I'm supposed to be packing my belongings, but the past few days, I've had no desire to. I just wanna wave a sparkly magic wand across our apartment, where lots of twinkly stars and glitter will appear, like in a cartoon, and then, voila! (sorry, too lazy to find out how to make the accent mark above the letter!) EVERYTHING is packed and ready to go! Yay!

Nay.

Shucks. Everyday our apartment is looking like an obstacle course. Squeeze between these boxes. Step over those boxes. Re-arrange this box. Open that box and take stuff out. Throw out that clutter!

Oooh! Clutter. We're bad with paper clutter. But we also hate waste. The trick is to try and keep paper piles in NEAT piles! All it takes is the wind from the open window to ruin a pile!

The other night, I told my mom we threw out some stuff (but didn't tell her what we threw out.) In her usual "heh heh" motherly tone of voice, she said, "Well, if I were there, honey, I'd help you save some things."

I got a little loud. Right, Mom! That's how you never get rid of anything! ("I know, I know!") How you have food 20 years old lying around that you forgot about! (silence. oops!)

I come from a family of pack rats. I married a pack rat whose father is a pack rat. I can't say I'm not a pack rat...I reeaaallly try hard not to be one because too much stuff and clutter around does unnerve me (unless it's in other people's homes!). And it's our fault. But sometimes I feel like I'm being sucked into a sort of pack rat vaccuum. A pack rat black hole!

I have to remind myself it's only temporary. I do know myself enough to realize that I am a last-minute packer. This is, after all, the sixth time we've moved since we've been married. I should be a pro at packing, right? Think again...!

The problem is, the longer you've been with someone, the more you accumulate. Do I throw this thing out that we haven't used forever and hardly works? Why the heck did hubby save these ink pens that barely work: did he think ink would magically come out again? (Shh...I threw them out!)

Why so much scrap paper? So we won't waste paper! %-0 Paper is WEIGHT. Just think of books. My man is the one who does almost all the physical moving. Ideally, you want to distribute the weight, so you lessen the chances of injuring yourself--specifically, your back. Previously, I kept books with books, bathroom stuff with bathroom stuff, etc. Don't have everything scattered in twenty different boxes. Don't mess with MY organizing system! Hear me out, he implored: it makes better sense to distribute the weight, especially with heavy items like books.

I resisted at first: I'M the organizer here, dude! I don't want to be hunting for everything when we settle down in the new place! :-( So I said to him, as long as you label every box and try to keep kitchen stuff together, and bedroom stuff together, it should be okay. I don't want a roomful of "mystery boxes"! ;-0 He agreed to label everything, and only mess with his stuff, not mine. ;-)

I try to think of packing as a search and destroy mission: what archeological treasures will I find? (I found my expired passport during our last move!) What should I throw out, or give away to the Salvation Army--or drop off in the Planet Aid bin across the street from us? My favorite black dress shoes? They're twenty something years old! Scratched up and really, little support! (I have to think about posture issues, y'know, being a licensed massage therapist!). I mostly wore those shoes for formal ocassions: weddings or funerals. Am I waiting for someone to get married? To die? How morbid! Well, they're going out; I've got my money's worth out of them!

Same thing with clothes: some things I've never worn or once or twice. Too much clothes! So why do I always look at clothes in the clearance section of a store, and take clothes from my big sister and cousins?! For change! Sometimes, you have to throw nostaglia out the window! %-0

Search and destroy! Find it! Throw it out! Keep it! Keep moving through your stuff like a time bomb was going to go off so you can get back to doing what you'd really like to do, which is anything but packing!


Recently, a longtime friend of mine asked me why I did I move so often? There were valid reasons, I told her, beginning with: when I moved to another city to go to college, move out at the year's end, move to a cottage with a friend, move out because of a nasty asshole boyfriend, move to a bedroom in a family home, move out again because of the nasty asshole boyfriend, move to uncle's apartment building, move out when hubby transferred to a new college, move out from student housing when hubby dropped out and move to the east coast and live with his parents, younger bro and sil all under one roof. Then move into our own home for nearly a decade, then move upstate so hubby could finish his degree. And now, back down to the sticks, to be near family again.

Did you get all that? All told, it's about ten times total for me for the last 22 years. So to the friend who asked me that, that's why I moved so many times.

Is it a such a bad thing? Some people ask me that question in a very patronizing way, as if moving were a character flaw or a felony. :-( What about military families? They often move a lot don't they?

I think it all depends on how open minded, flexible, and adaptable you are. I try to see it as a challenge to become more adaptable. I certainly think I benefitted, by getting to know a greater diversity of people, becoming aware of my own biases, and becoming more tolerant and open minded towards other peoples' views.

Yes, moving is a pain in the butt. No doubt about that! But it's only a temporary process. The more organized you are, the less painful life will seem! ;-0 Right now, I have periods of highs and lows, regarding our packing process. Part of me wants to leave it until the last week. The other part of me says get off your bee-hind! I thought I had tried to resolve that issue by doing a little bit each day, since we came upon the sudden decision to move last month. It worked pretty well, but maybe because the moving out date is getting ever closer, my time to spend with my close friends here and the proximity to them is coming to a close--is weighing on my mind. :-(

Leaving behind friends and activities that I was involved in the last five years isn't the easiest thing. Easier for hubby, since he's a homebody. But moving was my decision also. I'll miss them terribly. And yet I am looking forward to a new start. A new lease on life. A new adventure in an area we're not familiar with, and know no one but his parents, who only live there half the year, off and on.

I just need a magic wand to make everything look neat, clean, and pretty again in the apartment so I don't have to stumble over our own mess!

Fairy godmother! Do you exist? Where art thou?! :-0